SECTION 11
Key online safety
messages to share
with children
Education and support are the best tools that a child can have when it comes to understanding and managing risk online.
The following key online safety messages cover a wide range of topics, based on the risks that children and young people may encounter online. Whilst lots of children and young people will be using Wi-Fi in their homes with filtering in place or may have content restrictions set up on their personal devices, these kinds of controls are not guaranteed to be one hundred percent effective. Therefore, sharing key messaging can help support children and young people in their safe and responsible use of the internet.
1. CREATING AND SHARING CONTENT
As children grow older, their interests are likely to move from merely consuming content to creating and sharing content of their own, and there are several factors that need to be considered if they are to learn how to do this safely and responsibly. Depending on the age of the child you are talking to, two useful questions to ask could include:
“Who can see what you are sharing online?”
It’s important that children and young people keep their personal information safe and use the privacy settings that are available to them, to ensure that they’re happy with the audience for their posts. They may need help to put these in place.
It’s also essential to remember that even with these settings, screenshots can be taken, livestream can be recorded, messages and comments can be copied or forwarded on to others, and things posted online may resurface in the future.
“Do you have consent for what you want to share?”
When it comes to sharing content online, it’s important that you have consent from whoever is in the photos or videos that you upload. Consent is a key concept for children and young people to explore and understand, and one that is often overlooked. A straightforward way to talk about consent is that it must be:
- FREELY GIVEN: This means that no one should ever feel pressured into giving permission for something to happen.
- REVERSIBLE: If someone gave consent in the past, it is their right to change their mind.
- INFORMED: The person must be given all the information for them to be able to properly give consent.
- SPECIFIC: This means that each example of seeking consent needs to be specific to that moment, and that no assumptions can be made. For example, just because someone has given consent in the past doesn’t mean that you can assume that they would give consent again.
Modelling consent is important. Before posting pictures or any other content related to the young people in your life on social media, show them what you want to post and ask for their consent.
2. ONLINE FRIENDSHIPS AND RELATIONSHIPS
The online world is constantly evolving in terms of what children and young people can do, especially the ways in which they communicate with one another. There is little distinction now between ‘life online’ and ‘the real world,’ as being online is a natural extension of offline socialising and is very much a part of real life. Depending on the age of the child you are talking to, two useful questions to ask could include:
“How do you know this person?”
With so many children using the communication features offered within gaming platforms, friendships are developing online between people that have never met face to face, and so the messaging that children and young people receive must reflect this. Ensuring that an adult approves all friend requests is a useful step to take for younger children, as is investigating the settings that are provided to control whether the chat features are switched on or off.
With older children who can chat with other users online, it’s important to talk about the kinds of things that are okay to discuss online, and behaviours to be aware of that indicate something might not be right. Ensure that children and young people know that friends made online are still strangers, and if any conversation or behaviour makes them feel uncomfortable, for example if anyone is asking for personal information or for them to send images of themselves, then it’s vital they speak to a trusted adult straight away.
“What would you do if someone is pressuring you to do something that you don’t want to do?”
Pressure from others could include a number of different things, for example, requests to send images or videos of themselves (clothed, partially clothed, or nudes), joining in with behaviours that might upset others, or taking part in risky online challenges. The key messaging here is that no one has the right to pressure them into doing anything online that they are uncomfortable with, and if this is happening, to tell a trusted adult straight away.
A ‘healthy’ friendship or relationship is not one that is based on an abuse of trust or power, and it’s okay to say no to things that they do not want to do. However, as a child or young person it can be difficult to say no under pressure, and so these are conversations that need to be started, and even practised, at an early age.
3. MENTAL HEALTH
The internet is an incredible resource and a brilliant way to connect with others, engage with entertaining content, and explore new interests and trends. However, it’s important that children and young people understand the impact that online content can have on their mental health and overall wellbeing. If going online is beginning to have a negative impact on children and young people’s mental health, it’s important to be able to recognise that this is happening and take necessary steps to redress the balance and protect the child in question. Depending on the age of the child you are talking to, two useful questions to ask could include:
“How do you know when you’ve spent too long online or think you might need to take a break?”
Empowering children and young people to be able to look at themselves and identify the physical and psychological effects of going online is something that can be done from an early age. Young children may be able to identify physical symptoms such as sore eyes and headaches following too much screen time and will certainly be able to let you know how seeing something upsetting or scary makes them feel.
These conversations can then be developed and extended as children get older, delving more into the kind of content that they might be consuming and the effect that it can have, e.g., asking how influencer content makes you feel, having conversations around content being edited to ‘improve’ the aesthetic, and the fact that because people are likely to show their ‘best selves’ online, what you are viewing is not reality.
“What would you say to someone whose online activities were negatively affecting their mental health?”
This question is helpful for two reasons. Firstly, it gives children and young people the opportunity to demonstrate what they know about protecting their mental health online as it will be reflected in the advice they give. Secondly, it highlights the fact that going online can impact your mental health and therefore it’s useful to become as attuned to this fact as possible.
If children and young people are:
- Aware of the positive and negative emotions that going online can evoke
- Aware of the warning signs that something might not be okay
- Given the opportunity to talk about it openly and honestly
Then conversations around the internet, technology, mental health, and how to support each other will become a normal part of their development.
4. REPORTING CONTENT AND ASKING FOR HELP
If children and young people see something online that makes them feel upset, worried, or uncomfortable in any way, then the most important thing that they can do is tell a trusted adult straight away. It’s also important that any inappropriate online content is reported to the correct services. Depending on the age of the child you are talking to, two useful questions to ask could include:
“Who are the trusted adults in your life that you could go to for help if you had a problem online?”
This could be a family member, family friend, someone at school, or any other adult in their lives that they feel comfortable enough to speak with.
or
Read the next section 👉
More sections
Explore each chapter of the guide or download the full guide here